Domestic Bliss

I snore.

Oh trust me, I'm well aware of the fact. When you have the build of a linebacker, including a giant resonating chamber, sometimes silence is just not an option. However, it definitely follows certain patterns: congestion adds to the problem, as does alcohol, as do the extra 5 to 10 pounds I trade on and off when I'm happy and spending more time watching HGTV with my sweetie instead of walking like I should. Breathing through my nose (sometimes with the aid of BreatheRight strips) while side-sleeping in a fetal position helps quiet the beast.

So it's not a chronic problem, but when it happens, it means a less-than-ideal night's sleep for TFMD. And I feel really bad when those nights occur. But before you pity the poor girl too much, let me mention how she unconsciously gets her revenge...

First, there's the marathon running. I don't know what she's dreaming about, but there's a lot of travel involved. Her legs go on extended strolls in place, and it's difficult not to imagine all sorts of cinematic possibilities. I'll bet she's running from vampires. Or ninja. Or ninja vampires.

There's the vocalizations, of which I too am guilty. It'll usually be a body shift and a sigh, or the last part of a conversation. Dane Cook has a funny routine on this very subject. But honestly, the sighing and half sentences are pretty cute and not nearly as disruptive as my impersonation of Mount Vesuvius erupting.

It's when she punches me in her sleep that kinda throws a damper on a restful night. Last night in fact, it was the trifecta: escape from the ninja vampires, roll over and poke... pokepoke in the arm, sigh, humph, scoot scoot, rinse and repeat.

It's ever so amusing when we trade habits as well. Sometimes she'll snore, and I'll flee the ninja vampires. Once I actually elbowed her in the eye (didn't live that one down for a couple weeks). I'm sure we both occasionally question whether the spooning is worth it.

But learning (and putting up with) each other's sleep acrobatics (or sleeprobatics) is part of any long-term relationship. Whether snoring the house down, fighting ninja vampires or sleep boxing one's partner, it's all part of the greater whole (heh... he said "greater hole"). It's all part of what our therapist calls The Dance. So she wears earplugs and I give her plenty of sprawling space. And we go merrily on.

Downing-Marsh, 2
Vampires, 0

Yessir. That's love.

Reset! Reset!

I want a big ol' reset button for the day, like on a videogame console. So on days when I wake up at 4:30 in the morning with stress-induced TMJ pain (wearing a mouth guard has ceased to help), I can just punch the button and start the level over. It doesn't help that my grandmother is still back and forth to the hospital.

I'm in a bad place today.

But I have a coffee chat with Darlene this morning (happy belated birthday), and I'm going to be gentle with myself today.

And a Facebook friend (an old theater associate of Sam's, in fact) posted a link to a really excellent and thought provoking blog post. Amen, brother.

That's all I've got.

For now.

I'm sure, given enough time, I can find something else to complain about.

Gearing Up

I always go into manic mode before a shoot, with good reason. I want to make sure everything is covered, all the prep-work done. Perhaps more stressful in this case, I'll be working with three actors and a DP I've not previously worked with, our audio guy has to leave early and my fiancée will be there to observe and assist.

Just a little pressure. And I haven't directed ANYTHING in a year. And I haven't directed a SHOOT since Ordinary Angels.

But, for whatever reason, I'm feeling good. Feeling empowered. Feeling competent. And just a few butterflies, which is good.

And honestly, although I've not worked with these folks before, they come highly recommended by folks I HAVE worked with, so there you go. I'm looking forward to shaking the rust of my directorial chops.

Had a visit from JD yesterday. We traded stories and music and generally touched base (and it was a good touching, really). Other than that, it was kind of a rough day. Lots of driving, lots of schedule shuffling, and lots of bureaucracy to deal with from the insurance provider regarding a doctor's appointment for one of the kids.

Went up to Ballard and had dinner with my stepmom, celebrating my dad's birthday (which is on Friday, but she's off to a friend's farm for lambing season). Got to see some recently unearthed video footage of her and dad in England and Sweden on their last trip out there in 2002. It was surreal.

Have I mentioned that I miss my dad?

By the time we got home and retired for the night, I was in a rotten mood for a whole celebrity cavalcade of reasons. That led to stomach issues all night and dreams of the nightmare variety. Not my best night ever.

Awoke this morning to the automated call from the school district, informing us that Seattle Schools were starting two hours late due to snow and ice on the roads. Sure enough, we had what I would call a "heavy dusting" of snow overnight, but it's all but gone now.

It wasn't until I got home from taking Kayleigh to school that I noticed my mobile phone was missing. I kept calling from the land line, but couldn't hear it anywhere in the house. I actually began to panic until I tried one last time and my stepmom picked up. I'd left it at her apartment when we went to dinner last night. Fortunately, I was meeting her and my mom and stepdad at University Village for lunch, and -- crisis averted -- I got my phone back. We talked about my folks' recent trip to California and Mom showed us some pics of old friends on her camera. And of course, we talked wedding. Lots and lots of wedding. Specifically, the rehearsal dinner and accomodations for the out-of-town set. It was nice to see them all and hang out over lunch.

Now I'm home and ready to do my shot list for Saturday. Might not check in until Sunday or Monday, as my focus is going to be elsewhere. Have a great weekend!

Get 'Er Done!

I am really ready for the week to be over. Not just be over, but die an agonizing death and explode into a fine pink mist.

I did sleep much better last night. Hit the pillow at 10:45, awoke at 6:30 (no late-night wake-ups!). Took Kayleigh to school, came home, crashed out from 7:30 to 9AM. Awoke to the chime of my doorbell. Decided not to play along, as at that hour it's a salesman of some kind: political, religious or manual labor. Well I've already voted, I already have a close, personal relationship with God, and I have no use for your non-licensed, non-bonded ass using power tools and ladders and gardening implements in my yard, thanks.

Had a shower. Paid some bills. Took Tyler to school. Brought sushi to Raechelle at work. Went to Display & Costume for some last-minute costume bits (look at me being all "last-minute" a full week before the party). Saw an ex at D&C. Strange, only because it was unexpected - we didn't even acknowledge each other. Just went on our respective Halloween shopping ways. As it should be.

Came home to find that yes, it had been a religion salesperson. There was a door flier courtesy of the JWs. Hallelujah, I missed 'em.

I have a truck reserved for the dump run on Saturday. Look at me being proactive. Now if I could just muster the energy to get some words out of the lock-box in my head and into the actual Ordinary Angels pilot script, things would be better.

We canceled the OA script meeting tonight. There's a lot of sickness, exhaustion and just plain overbooking going on in our little crowd. I'm so having a beer tonight. And I'm gonna try on my costume to make sure everything is good. And I'm making a promise to be extra kind to myself for the next two weeks. I've been hyperfocused on everybody else's needs (old programming and the natural parental state), that I've really neglected my own emotional beast.

Who knows? I might even get a soak in the jet tub or even (gasp!) get to sleep early.

Another Hurdle Cleared

After sitting in some really weird highway 99 traffic, I managed to take Western Ave. (which is never faster than 99) and arrived at Raechelle's a mere half hour later than expected. But I had wine, so that was nice for everyone. TBGE cooked a delicious chicken with mushroom sauté and green beans, and we looked through her old yearbooks/high school photos. She got me caught up on all of her old prom dates and crushes, fawning and smiling. It was very cute.

Guitar Night went amazingly smoothly. There was no discomfort on my end and it didn't appear to be on anyone else's. In addition to the standard songs in the Guitar Night Binder, I played an original from my recording days with And Tears Fell (which was well received), as well as a coffee house arrangement I've done of Depeche Mode's "Blasphemous Rumours". It was cool meeting Travis Metcalf and Chris Taylor (not the game designer), Sean McParland was a great host and kept the fire pit ablaze, and Shaun Darragh gave me bigger props than I ever would have expected by calling me "brother" upon my exit. When you get that from the girlfriend's "big bro", I think you're officially in the family.

Got home a bit later than expected, but not too bad. Got the pets fed and kids in bed, sent out a thank you email, and I was asleep when my head hit the pillow at 11:30.

And that's when the dreams began. Some really random and partly disturbing dreams, the last of which woke me at 5:30 AM. I drifted in and out of light sleep until 7:30, but my REM sleep was very much done for the night.

Taking a sushi picnic to Raechelle today. Weather should be excellent.

We're at 48 hours and counting 'til California.

Joy.

So apparently, I'm not supposed to sleep at all tonight. It would be funny if it weren't so terribly sad.

Let's back up...

Had a bad case of crossed wires with the girl tonight. Turns out to be a mutual misunderstanding, but it meant disrupting normal evening activities for the both of us (apologies to Jamie, Tyler & Kayleigh). Unfortunately it also left me with that "unresolved conflict knot" in the pit of my stomach.

Of course it didn't help that as I was driving home from Raechelle's, I saw a streaking man (as in bare-ass nekkid) finishing his run around the block to the crowd of howling men and women at the bar. So that was imprinted on my brain.

In terms of getting to sleep, strike one.

Just as I was relaxing enough to drift off, a handful of guys decided to make a bunch of noise in the Westwood parking lot, sounding like they were throwing wood pallets against the asphalt and yelling about what a cool thing they were doing.

Strike two.

Fortunately a patrol from the Southwest Precinct rolls through every hour or so, and the group seemed to disperse. And just as the noise ceased and I started to drift off again... I heard the unmistakable whine of a mosquito above my left ear.

Strike three.

So I'm wide awake with the light on, having already done several close examinations of all the walls and ceiling expanse in a fruitless search for said mosquito. The noisy bunch outside has dispersed, but I still have a small knot in my stomach and I hope the issue with the girl will be resolved without major trauma (I think it will). Probably a good thing I have a packed schedule tomorrow... er, today. Some time offline to think and process.

And the noisy bunch has returned. Come on, SPD. Some of us folks gotta get up in a few hours.

Epiphanies, Breakthroughs and Beer

Yesterday began with getting Tyler to school, and it didn't let up until I crashed at 1:30AM this morning.

Got email correspondence and some graphics hunting done, the latter for Gavin's first project management gig with Deep7. Exercised and showered. Made a bank deposit. Got sushi at the new and improved QFC deli, where there is now a dedicated (and actually Japanese) sushi chef on hand. Two sushi trays and two green teas were half what I would have paid at Subway for sandwiches. And since both Raechelle and I have spent way too much this month on dating and generally going out, half is a good thing... and it made her happy.

We had a nice picnic out by Lake Union. Too brief, but baking in the sun ain't exactly the best idea for this Celtic warrior. Grabbed an Italian soda at Uptown Espresso by the West Seattle Bridge, as I had a few minutes to kill and didn't want to drive all the way home and then drive all the way back to the bridge for my counseling appointment. Got a text from Dan about the Duo pitch. No news to share yet.

Had a really eye-opening counseling session, just one on one. Much to ponder and process, all of it very encouraging. Raechelle and I will have a few things to discuss this weekend. Came home and checked email, made an appointment to look at a couple houses on Saturday. Dashed off with Tyler to the Charlestown for dinner with Mom, Bob & Gavin. After that, we drove by one of the houses on our list and took a look at the outside. Even though my mom isn't our agent (she referred an awesome lady in the local office), she's keeping pretty hands-on with pulling possible homes from the MLS reports.

Then Tyler and I headed up to Ballard, with a brief detour down First Ave to the El Gaucho, inside which is a cool little 21-and-over movie theater with a full bar where they run first run films (The Big Picture). I got two of the last four tickets for the Saturday night showing of The Dark Knight. Raechelle and I are double-dating with JD and Alison.

In Ballard, we picked up Kayleigh from Katherine's place, where she'd been hanging out all day, swimming and cycling. We dropped by Raechelle's apartment and hung out for a few minutes.

Once at home, the kids took Wiley for a walk. and by the time they got back, I could tell all hell was going to break loose. Screaming, whining, provoking... flip-flops were thrown, tears were shed. Tyler and I had words. Tyler was proactive and called Gavin himself so that he could be removed from the house and get a breather. I got Kayleigh ready for bed, had a couple beers and vented on the phone to Raechelle, who was incredibly supportive and soothing. We hung up and I went back upstairs to finish up for the day.

More email, more beer. Crashed at the aforementioned 1:30AM. Awoke at 6:30AM. Gah.

Today should hopefully be calmer, since Tyler is usually somewhat contrite after these meltdowns. And there were three aspects to this one that made it easier than some of the more extreme ones in the past: 1) it's been some time since his last removal to Gavin's house; 2) he initiated it, which shows that he is more self-aware regarding when he needs a break; 3) it was quite a bit milder than previous outbursts.

So that was my day... that, and something humorous and bizarre which requires a second post.

Independence Day

Got various Asian foods for dinner last night. Tyler actually awoke to eat. Raechelle arrived with her vacation suitcase in hand and a bag of last-minutes from Target (one of them being a new case for her digital camera). She wanted to stay up late in order to be able to sleep better on the plane, so we popped in The Lost Skeleton of Cadavra (another must-see for film geeks, as it's such a great parody of cheesy sci-fi/horror flicks of the late '50s/early '60s).

Then I put in some Extras. The girl seemed to like 'em. It's like The Office, but for the film industry.

Note to self: sharing a bottle of wine = good. Sharing two bottles of wine = bad.

Ended up getting about 2 hours sleep, then woke up and got Raechelle to the airport. Halfway there, Raechelle realized she'd left her camera in its new case at my house. We joked that "it's not really a vacation unless you leave something at home." I suggested she get something specifically travel related that she could leave at home on purpose in the future.

Came home and was too wired from having driven to the airport to go back to sleep. Poked around online for awhile. Then went downstairs to collapse, only to have my cell phone start blowing up with texts. Family plans, sister pinging from Paris, friends and their dreams.

I tossed and turned until about 10AM and decided to give up. Plus, I hadn't had anything to eat yet. Still haven't. I'm in a "grrr" place right now, and I'm not sure if it's because I'm hungry, tired, or sans girlfriend for a whole week. [shrug] Well, two of those I can do something about, so here goes.

Oh, Dan got a revised Duo budget off to Titan yesterday - we'll see what they think.

Have a happy and safe 4th of July!

Weird

Well, I took NyQuil and zonked until 6AM without incident, so this bug is definitely on the run.

I don't know if it's the big-ass harvest moon, the solstice, the flu/cold/crud, or evolving relationship stuff (all of the above?), but I'm feeling weird, isolated and sorta precarious. Very weird energy today. Just want to go curl up in a fetal position and sleep for a week. Wake me when it's no longer weird.

Apologies for the short and cryptic post.