So Be Good (For Goodness Sake)

I never understood if the lyric meant that we kids should be good for the sake of being good (which seems like sort of a weak argument to most six-year-olds), or more like it was being barked by a tired, cranky parent during holiday purchasing at the mall: "Be good, fer cryin' out loud!"

But I digress.

The holidays walk among us.  They infiltrate our society with their holiday glamours and make us all giddy with mirth.  Kind of like vampires, but more jingly and less "bitey".  Okay, whatever.  It's holiday time, which means...

Kayleigh just tested for her green belt in tae kwon do!  She's got one more level of green after this, and then she goes into two levels of blue.  She's doing very well, and we're really proud of her.

Oh yes, and there's some Christmas decoratin' going on at the New Circle-D Ranch...

In other news, I woke up this morning [blues riff here], and stepped in cat barf.  It should be said that stepping in cat barf (in bare feet) first thing in the morning is one of my least favorite activities.  Actually stepping in cat barf at any time and in any footwear at all hardly makes the must-do list of pastimes.  I should have been more vigilant, but even living with a bulimic feline, I truly didn't expect to make such a warm and squishy footfall so early in the morning.

Later this morning, while getting dressed, I stepped in a cold puddle next to my bed.  Apparently the cats had decided to go after my water glass.  I threw a towel down to sop it up and quickly inspected the Alphonse Mucha prints stacked nearby for damage.  There was some.  I don't know how extensive yet.

I loaded Tyler into the car, cursing my feline housemates, unable to thaw my windshield with frozen washer fluid sprayers.  Then we sat in downtown traffic for an hour and a half.  Let me repeat: it took an hour and a half to get from West Seattle to the University District.  Fortunately the folks at the CHDD Autism Center were very forgiving, and we were able to continue with the diagnostic clinic.  We'll know more later this month.

That's all I've got for now.  Kayleigh's band concert is tonight, after which I will be collapsing in bed for immediate dust-off and evac.  And tomorrow morning, I'm wearing my slippers.

Daddy's Girl

In the midst of moving out of my first home after 15 years, arranging treatment for my son, planning my wedding and quietly observing what would have been my 19th wedding anniversary with Samantha (yesterday), I am happy to be greeted by a smile and a hug from my daughter, who turns twelve today.

I'm reminded of the relatively quick, complication-free labor and delivery (just over 4 hours), and the tiny, frail baby girl we brought home. Home to the house we're now packing to leave. Our cat, Gryphon, dwarfed her (as he'd dwarfed Tyler before). And now she's almost a teenager, taller than her stepmom-to-be, talented, smart and beautiful. And testing for her second belt in Tae Kwon Do.

Although I cannot tell you how ecstatic I am that TFMD is here to girl-bond with Kayleigh, I think the bond my daughter and I forged in the crisis of losing Sam and my father (and the house disasters that followed) will have a powerful, lasting effect on our respective lives.

My little girl is twelve today. That makes me smile.

Generic Blog Entry

Aaaaaand another week flies by. How do they keep doing that?

I suppose it might have something to do with the last go-rounds of negotiations on the sale and purchase of homes, the last "just one more thing" for the lender, the "oh yeah, we'll need to think about"s for the new house. You know, the usual.

In other news, approximately a bazillion and three friends have been knocked on their asses by der Schwein flu. Yikes. Now my brother and sister-in-law have it. Poopy. Seems like just earlier this year I was in the ER, getting hydrated from an all-day vomipalooza. That piggy flu doesn't mess around.

So far, the kids have re-adapted to school. Tyler is actually going, which is a huge improvement over last year. Kayleigh switched her band instrument from the clarinet to the alto sax (along with two of her friends). I expect to hear a lot of Pink Panther Theme and Yakkity Sax in the near future.

Last Friday, I joined some old friends at the EMP/SciFi Museum at Seattle Center, including a couple I'd not seen in over two years. It was good to get caught up, and it made me realize I need to be better at keeping in touch with the people in my life, whether they live here in town or across the state.

Now we just wait for the whole house process to finish. Huzzah.

"What're Ya, YELLOW?"

Kayleigh had her first belt test last Friday, and was awarded her yellow belt at class on Wednesday. I could not be prouder. I even got to hold the board she split with an axe kick - on the first try.

Two open houses scheduled for this weekend. We had five agents at the broker's open yesterday. And next Tuesday my stepdad is going to come down from Bellingham and help me install a wooden railing on the front porch and pour a new concrete bottom step.

And last but not least, the heatwave broke last night. We awoke to overcast skies and a gentle breeze. In other words, the weather we Seattleites are used to. Back down to a nice, summery 82F.

Welcome, weekend!

Re-inspired

By all rights I should not feel as good as I currently do. Last night was spent in the ER, but this time not for me - for Tyler. But this time not for psychiatric evaluation - for the concussion he gave himself when he was running for a bus stop near the Junction, tripped and lost a fight with the sidewalk.

Life as a parent is one giant lesson in how to take things in stride without going fruitbasket-crazy. I think I'm finally getting the hang of it.

Case in point: I had a nice long meditation and moment of Zen regarding The Tyler Conundrum. Without descending into detail, the result was that I was able to release that sense of guilt that most all parents possess - you know, that little inner critic who blames you for your offspring turning out a certain way, as if you didn't actually do everything possible at every step of the way to give them the tools necessary for success? That's the one. Well it's been tarred, feathered and driven from the premises, hopefully to be heard from no more.

I'm focusing on the greater good: an upcoming wedding, summer activities for the kids, and Househunt II: The Return of Househunt. We've got six properties to go see tonight. And things like this make me happy. I've been re-inspired creatively and on a basic human level. So, with that...

Yabba dabba friggin' doo.

Sunbreak

...of sorts.

As I have mentioned previously, we are having issues with our teenager. Above and beyond your average teenager issues. It's been sapping every ounce of strength and energy we have, hence the lack of blog posts. The behaviors have been escalating, resulting in interventions by mental health professionals and the police. It's sort of like watching this dark cloud form over his head, growing darker and angrier, until it erupts in thunder and lightning and a deluge of acid rain.

But I saw a sunbreak yesterday. It was a subtle shift, but it was there.

Without going into detail, one of the hallmarks of Tyler's anger is that it is usually so blind that any attempt to disengage or calm him down usually results in an explosion of rage (and me spackling holes in the wall the next day). Not surprising, considering the trauma he's been through in his short life.

But yesterday, in the midst of conflict, when I was just settling in for the long haul, he applied the brakes, turned the angry car around, and altered his behavior on his own accord, without outside coercion. Now, Tyler has exploded and come back calm before. But this was completely different. It was a conscious decision to disengage from the conflict and re-engage in a totally positive way.

While Raechelle took Kayleigh to her martial arts lesson, Tyler and I walked to the store for supplies, then came home and made spaghetti with meatballs, fresh fruit salad and a mixed green salad with ingredients from our own garden. At one point, Tyler said to me, "I like cooking with you." I told him I liked it too. Dinner was a success, and afterward we watched the freaky storm whip through our neighborhood. Tyler went to bed at the correct time without incident (usually a high-stress time as TFMD and I wonder what form his outburst will take).

As his father, nobody has been burned more by these apparent changes in the past. By all rights, I shouldn't feel as optimistic as I do. But I do. Something changed. It was small, but profound nonetheless. And now he's in a partial day program which provides him with solo and group therapy, anger management, health & wellness support, and follow-up care.

I'm hoping to build on the success of last night. For the first time in several weeks, I saw my son emerge again. It was wonderful.

The New Normal?

Good lord, I hope not.

Sorry to have dropped off the radar for the past week, but I figured a post was far past due.

Things with the teenager have been tense. We prepared for a major meltdown with the coming of Memorial Day weekend, as we have learned that holidays and anniversaries can be huge triggers with Tyler. We actually scored what I feel to be a minor victory in that we had a really nice weekend with much family bonding, and the outburst on Monday night was handled without police intervention.

One of the problems in having my stoic tendencies is that often stress becomes internalized and manifests in all sorts of uncomfortable ways. So it should be no surprise that I developed a pinched nerve in my shoulder, which resulted in burning pain, numbness and tingling down my entire left arm. It's not heart-related. Don't worry. But it's no fun either.

So this week has been split between Tyler's psych/counseling appointments and a host of physical therapy appointments for me. A trip to the doctor, three trips to the chiro, and two trips to the LMP for massage. I'm hitting this with everything I can, eastern and western. Ibuprofen, cyclobenzaprine, hydration and B-complex vitamins, Biofreeze, ice packs, chiropractic and massage (including craniosacral and reflexology). I might even go in for an acupuncture session (seeing as how I've had some good results with it in the past). I am very happy to have insurance, but the co-pays are nickel-and-diming me dry this month.

Anyway, numb fingers aside (and I can tell you that not being able to feel half your fingers makes typing a blog post quite an adventure), it seems to be getting gradually better and my overall mood has improved. I hope that by this time next week, I'll be back up to normal functioning.

As TFMD mentioned in her post, she got herself a nasty computer infection, which an old friend and IT guru has been working on. He is due back this morning to (hopefully) finish and get Rae Rae back online. Last night's production meeting was, for lack of a better term, productive. We're revising the Duo budget and made some more progress on the OA series.

And speaking of independent cinema, I have two recommendations:

Fanboys appears at first to be another point-and-laugh at socially-retarded fans engaging in goofy shenanigans, but surprised me quite a bit in its character depth and subtext. It's a really sweet story, well-written and acted, with some fun cameos and a charming (if somewhat hidden) love story. And the film was made by Kevin Spacey's production company, Trigger Street.

And speaking of Kevin Spacey (and space in general), Moon was just featured at SIFF, and has been getting rave reviews. It's a British production starring Sam Rockwell as the lone technician in an automated mining facility on the moon, supplying Helium-3 to Earth for clean energy. His three-year contract is just two weeks from being up when he begins to go a bit space-crazy. Kevin Spacey is the voice of the computer (and second lead character). Looks like a character fest for Rockwell, who I find is always surprising folks with his unflinching embrace of challenging roles. Should be getting general release this year.

Anyway, this weekend should hopefully be a little less stressful, with Kayleigh away at a school band trip and Tyler starting a new RPG campaign at Gavin's. Tyler has his sleep study tonight. Sunday is our May Birthdays celebration in Bellingham, and it'll be nice to hang out with the fam.

That's all I've got for now. Anon.

Family Dynamics

Tyler turned 15 on Sunday.

Once again, I'm not going to go into detail on the situation, except to say that after three days in Respite Care, he has a new appreciation for his family. Once I was done walking on eggshells last weekend, I actually had a pretty good time. Doug & Ann brought lunch over, and we went out back and played some badminton (emphasis on the "bad"), followed by a trip to Kitty Harbor, a cat shelter/adoption service in West Seattle.

Tom came home with us...

Although he's altered and therefore not technically a tom, "Tom" was the name he came with. He was a rescue; he'd been kept in a chicken coop and the ammonia from the chicken feces had burned his pads and caused a lot of his hair to fall out. And yet, the moment I sat down, he was the first to come over and say hello. He was equally affectionate toward Raechelle and the kids.

The kids say his full name is Tom Shanks, but I call him The Colonel, because from the moment he arrived he was managing Elvis. He's about the same age and size as our other fuzzy boy, and they wrassle and play tag and get up to the usual kitty mischief.

Anyway, Raff came over for birthday dinner, and we had homemade lasagna and marionberry pie and watched The King of Kong (awesome).

Then my stomach cramped up, I got light-headed and lost every ounce of strength. Turns out I got a bit more sun playing badminton than I'd previously thought. It was mostly better by Monday morning.

Monday was spent running admin errands and talking to Tyler's school therapist, who helped us finally get the crisis care we needed with Tyler. Then counseling, then dinner, then trying to establish a new weeknight routine. So far, so good. Wednesday, Tyler begins seeing a child psychiatrist specializing in teens and trauma - we're hoping that will start him on a healing path.

This morning, I went in for my first dental check-up and cleaning in years. The ol' ivory is still good, considering the lack of professional maintenance. I didn't have a single cavity until I was in my mid 20s; I thank my grandparents for good dental genes (as they still have all their own teeth in their 90s). I'll have to get a filling cleaned up soon, and there's a suggestion to whiten a bit before the wedding (which I'm thinking about), but overall a big thumbs up from my new dentist. Who was Sam's old dentist. And they still had her in their system from back when she was on my insurance almost a decade ago. Now Raechelle's insurance lists me as "spouse" (which I guess is admin for "domestic partner" for the time being). I haven't had health or dental insurance since 2002, so it's nice to be covered again. We sometimes joke that I'm marrying Raechelle for her insurance and she's marrying me for my house. Whatever works, right?
I hope you all realize I'm joking...

So... the Duo shoot was cancelled last Sunday (Mother's Day), but Dan and I have been plotting our next move(s) when we can. I have the feeling that this is a crazy and stressful time for many of my friends and family members. Stupid Mercury Retrograde (or whatever scapegoat you'd care to blame).

I remain optimistic about Tyler's future treatment, now that we're no longer shackled to State mental health care. And I'm thoroughly impressed with TFMD. Apparently she must really love me (and the kids). She really earned her first Mother's Day stripes. And then some.

My Boy

As TFMD mentioned in her update, we've been having behavior issues with Tyler, who turns 15 this Sunday. It would be inappropriate to go into detail here, but suffice to say they are issues that go far beyond your typical teenage rebellion. This should not be surprising. Tyler is far beyond your typical teenager in terms of intelligence, and has had far more than your typical amount of trauma in his short life.

The behavior has been escalating. He's definitely hurting, and we're doing everything we can to get him the help he needs. That's all I will say at this point. I love my son dearly, and am focused on his health and happiness, while also providing a stable environment for the other three people in the household. It's a tightrope walk.

So there ya go. Hopefully some happy posting in the near future.

U-Turn

Growing up in the Bay Area, the U-turn is just a way of life. Sam & I were amazed to find that an alien concept when we arrived in Seattle in 1991. Oh, it's not that folks don't do it here, it's just that it's not ingrained in the cultural fabric as it is in California (and other states with lots of straight roads).

I use this particular traffic custom as a metaphor for the day. It started out going one direction and it's done a complete about-face.

As Inigo Montoya says, "Let me 'splain... No, there is too much. Let me sum up."

Last night. TFMD away for dinner with a friend. Met up with amigos online and did some CoH. Late night getting to bed. Took a swig of codeine cough syrup AND a Sudafed. Bam. Out like a light. This morning. Still coughing and snotty. Woke kids. TFMD drove Kayleigh to school on her way to work. Trouble with the boy. Saw a dire situation about to happen and contacted IEP teacher to head it off at the pass. Crisis averted. Calmed down and started to be productive. Was productive.

Met an old Pandy friend (I say "old", but he's really 20) while paying for my iced tea at the QFC. That was cool - we might be able to use him in a project or two. Got some brown rice sushi (cucumber rolls, freshly made just for me). Got some prep work done on the next short. Stress significantly reduced.

So, from dire to directorial. A U-turn of a day is something to celebrate, no?

Oopsie.

I haven't gone into too much detail about Tyler recently because a) he's almost 15 and I have a modicum of respect for his privacy when it comes to public discussion, and b) it's not really anyone's business. But something came up over the past 24 hours that has me fuming - and it's not about Tyler, per se. It's about a teacher.

Last Wednesday, I attended an IEP meeting at the high school, with Tyler and the IEP "team". An IEP is an Individualized Education Program, geared toward helping students who may have emotional disorders or learning disabilities succeed in public school. Keep in mind that three of my four grandparents were public school educators (as is my brother), and I've always given public education a slight benefit of the doubt in terms of the teachers and administrators really caring about my kids and what happens to them.

Also keep in mind that Tyler's most recent IEP was started at the end of 8th grade, and did not get put in place until last Wednesday. So I was understandably skeptical that anything was going to happen. And thusly very pleasantly surprised when I found a very competent and caring teacher assigned to Tyler's case. All seven of us in the meeting (including and especially Tyler) put ideas on the table and together we hammered out what we think will be an effective educational program for my son.

Of course, such things, once implemented, take time to show results.

So let's catch up: IEP meeting last Wednesday. Tyler in school on Thursday. Home study on Friday and Monday. Back on-site at school on Tuesday & Wednesday.

Wednesday night, I received an exasperated email from one of Tyler's teachers, saying how disruptive he was and how she was doing everything asked of her by his IEP (which had only become officially implemented at the beginning of this week), and aren't there any expectations of Tyler in all of this? As if we'd bend over backwards to make Tyler's school experience soft and cushy without standards of behavior and a mechanism to hold his feet to the fire and pony up some personal responsibility.

That perturbed me a bit, but it was late and I let it go, not wanting to fret about it all night.

Then, first thing this morning, another email arrived, from another teacher echoing the sentiments of the first teacher. He ended the email with "has anyone thought about contacting CPS?"

You're f**ing kidding me.

CPS??

Really?

I wonder if the teacher realized that both Tyler and I are on the email list. Oopsie.

Now, I'm all for the existence of Child Protective Services. It's unfortunate that they have to exist, but it's a generally good thing they're in place. When Tyler was two, he took a header off the front porch while Sam was gardening, had a seizure of sorts, and ended up in the ER at Children's Hospital. Before we were allowed to leave, we were interviewed by a case worker from CPS - just to make sure we weren't beating our child. After the initial shock (and a bit of insult, to be sure), we both realized that it was good that someone was looking out for Tyler's well-being like we were.

However, you don't call CPS if a student is being disruptive. You don't assume things are bad at home because one of your thirty kids is making the already herculean task of teaching that much more difficult. In fact, if a teacher suspects abuse at home, he or she is REQUIRED by law to contact CPS, not just bat the concept around dismissively. And you certainly don't jump on the bandwagon before there has been adequate time to distill some results.

I'm just a bit ticked off. Well, more than a bit. Okay... a LOT.

After more than a year, we finally have an IEP in place, and a caring IEP team to facilitate. In most things, I'm firmly on the side of teachers. But these teachers are not making it easy to be on their side.

Here Comes the Sun

And I say... it's alright.

We had gorgeous weather yesterday. Spring seems to have spring, instantly and with a vengeance. As evidenced by TFMD's marathon sneezing jags. Wheeee!

After standing us up last week, Comcast sent their dude out to set up our revamped service. A new HD-capable set-top box and remote (to replace the ancient AT&T remote that dated back at least 10 years or more), a new cable modem, and phone service to replace Vonage. Gave us a package deal I couldn't refuse. And although I'm usually not down with monopolies, I haven't been screwed by Comcast... yet. What's nice is that, although the projector is not HD, we can still see the HD channels (and they look good, just not true HD on the projector). If and when we upgrade the projector, voila - instant HD. We also moved the old tiny cable box downstairs to the bedroom, and the guy gave us another new remote, so now we have all the channels and the on-screen guide in the bedroom. Nice for chilling in the sanctuary. Rae said she couldn't wait to get sick so she could lie in bed and watch cable all day.

It was an otherwise normal day, until Tyler came to me in the afternoon and asked me to buzz his hair off. After years of fighting haircuts at every turn, and cultivating a very "emo" look. He likes to keep us on our toes, that one. So I happily sat him down in the carport outside, and started with the biggest guard. "Can you go shorter?" he asked. Of course I can go shorter. So in about 3 or 4 passes, I had it down to the 1/2" guard, and he was pleased. He also asked me to shave off his "boy-stache", as he heard that it will grow in thicker if he keeps shaving it.

Before

After

My little boy is growing up. And he looks a lot like Sam. I was taken aback by the "after" photo I snapped. Anyway, he's happy with it and he looks great. And we took advantage of the weather and had a picnic dinner outside: hot dogs and potato salad.

By the time Castle rolled around, I was exhausted. Rae & I slept like two very immobile things, not waking up all night. And I must say, it's a lot easier to rise in the morning when the sun is already coming up.

This week is another emotional roller coaster. From the high of my grandparents' 68th wedding anniversary to the anxiety of my grandmother's repeat hospitalizations and colonoscopies, to the anniversary of my brother Matt's death, to the anniversary of Sam's death. But I'm just going to admire the sunshine and push through. I'm going to get some cucumber rolls for lunch and heat up some brown rice, and try not to think about the downside.

Yep, here comes the sun. And I say... it's alright.

Once More...

Once more unto the breach, dear friends, once more;
Or close the wall up with our English dead.
In peace there's nothing so becomes a man
As modest stillness and humility:
But when the blast of war blows in our ears,
Then imitate the action of the tiger;
Stiffen the sinews, summon up the blood,
Disguise fair nature with hard-favour'd rage;
Then lend the eye a terrible aspect;
Let pry through the portage of the head
Like the brass cannon; let the brow o'erwhelm it

- Wm. Shakespeare, Henry V

My grandmother went to the hospital again last night. Same recurring problem. My mom texted me this morning, saying that they were giving her another unit of blood.

My phenomenal Tuesday came crashing down around dinner time. TFMD was shellshocked from a miserable workday, and we'd planned our pizza movie night for that evening, since we won't be around on Friday. So I had pizza delivered and waiting when she got home. And since she'd never seen Ghostbusters, we put that in. And I didn't follow my instinct to pull away from the "grrr" radiating from my fiancee's head. I just sat there and let her relax over the course of the movie, finally cuddling up. It's a new way of doing things for me, but I'm willing to adapt.

She was able to rebound pretty well, until we ran into evening complications with the kids, who are on spring break this week and feeling all sorts of entitled. So once that was all sorted out, we sort of cuddled angrily (angry not with each other, but with how the day had run its course) and drifted off to sleep. Awoke with some pretty bad jaw pain - although the mouth guard might keep my teeth from grinding at night, it doesn't stop the jaw muscles from tensing up.

TFMD called from work this morning to see if I wanted to drive up to Bellingham to see my grandmother. Weather is crappy, but I'm really considering it now. We'll see what happens this morning when my mom gets to the hospital.

[EDIT: This is SO not an April Fool's joke, just in case anyone was suspicious.]

"Lord, Why Do You Hate My Trains?"

The week has just sped by, thankfully.

For some reason, I've really felt "besieged" recently. Like everybody requires their pound of flesh. And although in my roles as parent, professional and partner, that's par for the course, for some reason I've been much more sensitive to it in the past couple weeks.

It didn't help that yesterday I found myself making three round trips from one side of West Seattle to the other, during peak traffic times, behind every joker doing 10mph UNDER the speed limit. Or that I had to do the grocery shopping at the only time available to me, which was 5:30PM, which, coincidentally, is also when they let every inmate out of the asylum to do THEIR grocery shopping. We're talking freakshow. Of Jerry Springer proportions. I've spent 18 years maintaining the belief that Seattle is a step above the whole lowest-common-denominator, trailer-trash phenomenon, but then when I moved to West Seattle in '93, there were still two gun shops and a porn shack on California Ave. So I guess it has improved, but that just makes watching the freakshow that much more... freakish.

It also hasn't helped that my workstation blew the motherboard and I had to replace it (a new system was cheaper and quicker than ordering a new motherboard), and that said new system keeps having random lock-ups. And I have to call the State Department of Revenue to find out why they have two differnt UBI numbers for my company. And I have to meet with yet another teacher who has been assigned to Tyler's IEP. The same IEP that was put in motion at the end of 8th grade.

I think I'm just in emotional lock-down right now, putting out all of these little fires as they crop up. As we get further into spring and the weather starts cooperating, perhaps things will shake loose a bit and I won't be so "grrr".

50 points if you can name the quote that is today's title.

Weekend Update

This past weekend turned out to be a lot more productive and fun than I'd anticipated, despite the food poisoning.

Let me 'splain.

Friday was a school holiday for the kids, so Tyler had Miles over and Kayleigh had her friend Darian for a sleepover. We made french bread pizza and watched Oliver Stone's W. A bit long, but entertaining and just a tad scary throughout. While I know Stone is something of an iconoclast, much of the dialogue is taken straight from published sources and recordings. I mostly wanted to see it for Josh Brolin, who is amazing.

Saturday we actually slept in past 8:AM (woohoo!), then I made pancakes. Then Darian went home and TFMD and I went up to Ballard, to the office of my friend Brittany, who runs Eiffel Printing & Design. Meanwhile Tyler & Kayleigh took the Metro to their uncle's house - by themselves - for their game afternoon/evening.

After a couple hours of weddingish activities at Eiffel, Rae and I opted for lunch at Blue C. I loves me some Japanese food - even sushi (without the stuff that makes me sick), and I thought I was safe grabbing the cucumber rolls. But no. Shortly after we arrived home, I experienced a shellfish/MSG reaction. Either there was some cross-contamination on the cutting boards, or there was MSG in the sesame noodles or chicken teryaki. Either way, I was out of commission for the rest of the night.

My wonderful woman tucked me in bed, then cuddled up and watched my favorite pirate movie, The Black Swan. Then she went and picked up Dan & Trish from the airport. Then she came home and we proceeded to fall into a comatose state.

Sunday morning came, and I was feeling well enough for coffee with my buddy Ron. We hadn't had a coffee chat Sunday for about a month, so it was good to get together. I got back home to find TFMD had been cleaning and doing her finances. I joined in the fun, then we piled into Sportacus and went to Macy's to find Tyler a pair of khakis and a dress shirt to wear next Saturday for Doug & Ann's reception. He actually liked the corduroy Dockers we found on clearance. And he's now wearing a 30" inseam, a mere 2" shorter than mine. Did I mention that at his last doctor visit two weeks ago, he was 5'9"?

We tagged along with the wimminz for a while, until TFMD started stressing that we were being bored. So Tyler and I wandered out into the mall and got our Julius on. Found a sweet iridescent blue snapcase for my phone, and Kayleigh got a top to wear on Saturday. Mission accomplished.

Then it was home, where cleaning and organization continued. I made a pasta dinner, and then back to the organization yet again. I daresay TFMD will be blogging about that aspect in far more detail, but suffice to say we got a lot organized. We watched some Sunday night animation on Fox, and then it was all about the Zs.

We're off into another week, and it looks like it's gonna go pretty fast.

My Life in a Snow-Globe

Apparently, Mother Nature either didn't get the memo or chose to ignore it. Once again. And it's friggin' MARCH. Yet here we are, on March 9th, at friggin' sea level, with another snow flurry whipping through.

I didn't get a chance to see The Watchmen this last weekend. I wanted to take Tyler, but there was just no way, between him sounding like the seal house at the zoo and us with previous engagements on the calendar. We finally got to see Always... Patsy Cline at ACT. Good show with strong performances. And, six degrees of separation and all that, the drummer in the band is also the drummer for Trepan (whose vocalist is Kevin Schumacher), and one of the two women in the show is in Jet City Improv, and knows the Greenleaf family. And of course Don, the guitarist in the band (and the disc jockey in the play), is the big brother of Rae's ex. Small town, eh? Especially in the arts.

I'm keeping Tyler's bug at bay, but it may be a losing battle. Nobody is sleeping very well. Lots of changes in barometric pressure as we go from highs in the 50s to highs in the teens and 20s with snow flurries.

I got a rough cut done on the Duo short, then went back and tweaked for a 2nd draft. This week I will finalize the cut and get the audio sorted out. I now spot some holes in my direction that I'm kicking myself over. But that's why it's good to do these shorts as a practice run for the feature. Almost like a sports team watching game footage. Here's were we went wrong, now we can fix it.

I like the titles and music (thanks Brian Chase and Kyle Stevens), and the acting performances (when they're not being hampered by poor direction). As it is, I think it does the job. But I want to see it in sequence with the other shorts to gauge its full value.

I probably would never have found Stephen Rader's blog were it not for my sweetie. And I'm ever so thankful. For while she gets to ogle the pretty boys in his Fratboy Friday feature, I get some pretty cool comic book, film and pop culture commentary. One such noteworthy item is this comedy duo from Atlanta by way of NYC. BriTANick. Your mileage may vary, but I've always been a fan of absurdist comedy.



And with that, anon.

Plowin' Through

I guess I'm better under fire than I give myself credit for when facing down a week as packed as this. But here I am, checking off the to-do list and shuttling people and appointments all around. I feel a bit like The Colonel...



The shoot is this Saturday. I'm a bit nervous, but it's the good butterflies I always get before a shoot.

Rae's innards are apparently not to be worried about at this point in time, so that's nice. We dropped the kids at Tae Kwon Do yesterday and walked across the street to Prost! for a wee happy hour of our own. I had an Oktoberfest and TFMD had a V&T. It reminded us of the picture of our deoderants in the medicine cabinet. And of course of our actual relative dimensions.

Anyhoo, we're celebrating 9 months together today. Doesn't seem like a long time at all, but then again, so much has happened in such a short period. Craziness.

That's all I've got for now. Anon.

(Welcome to) Hell Week

The weekend was a lot fuller than we'd anticipated, even with the subtraction of the Always... Patsy Cline show at ACT (I've never been there, and the Google directions were way off, so we changed our tickets). It meant that we actually had a little down time before running off to dinner at Kyle & Mandi's. I love having them as friends, and talking shop is always fun. Kyle played us some of the new Collider CD, and I complimented him on how "in-his-element" he sounded.

Sunday was coffee with Ron, followed by decorating and prep for the Oscar party I volunteered to host. I have GOT to stop volunteering to host every gathering that comes up - it's just that I love to host gatherings, and it's so much easier to worry about childcare when you're in your own home. We had seven people plus the two of us, all eating, drinking and guessing on the awards.

And now we begin a week so packed with stuff I can't think straight and my head gets all swimmy. Kids start Tae Kwon Do. Both have counseling. Kayleigh has after school programs. Tyler has a doctor appointment and full blood panel. We have a family dinner in Ballard, a Costco run for supplies for Saturday's shoot, and a production meeting for said shoot, plus another dinner on Friday. Madness, I tell ya.

And then there's the issue of TFMD's cervix. I wasn't gonna blog about this, but since she laid it out there, I will just add that it's got me worried. Not because I think anything IS wrong, but due to my experience with cancer, what COULD be wrong. I know better than to dwell there, but I'm not gonna lie and say it hasn't crossed my mind. I offered to take her to her appointment today, but she opted for the best-girlfriend option and that's cool. I knew she was a bit freaked yesterday when she came home from dress shopping. We have a few things on the schedule this evening, but hopefully we can retire early.

Lots going on in both of our noggins, to be sure. I just want to get through the week and burn some tape* on Saturday.

"burn some tape" = shoot a movie

Why Valentine's Day Didn't Suck This Year

Let me count the ways...

Saturday arrived, the third anniversary of the fire which had claimed the house. TFMD and I took the kids to see Coraline at the AMC Southcenter. And here's the irony: I have traditionally gone to Southcenter over theaters downtown because of the easy and plentiful parking. But since the rennovation of the mall, it's like being stuck in a traffic jam downtown. So if I venture to Southcenter for a movie theater experience in the future, it'll be at the Parkway Plaza, which has better sets and easier parking.

After the movie, we had an early dinner at Applebee's, then headed home where Rae and I promptly passed out for a couple hours before walking to Westwood for a few necessities. It was a slow-moving Saturday evening, with Must Love Dogs and the first act of Down With Love before we simply had to retire for the night.

Sunday was a leisurely, with both TFMD and me tackling various organizational projects: she, her files, and me, the DVD Wall. I hate organizing DVDs, because I don't like to alphabetize, yet I can't always find a neat category for a specific title. But I got it more or less sorted in the end.

Sunday evening, both kids went off to their respective overnights and TFMD took me out for a (post) Valentine's Day evening. We took a cab to the Triple Door, where we had an amazing dinner and saw Lisa Hannigan and her band, who had completely blown us away when she opened for Jason Mraz. This time, she was the headliner, with her guitarist, Gavin Glass, opening with a short set of his own. It was a busy night for Gavin.



Picked up a copy of Gavin's CD, had it signed (as he was hanging out back by the soundboard) and took a cab home. And of course, what would two adults-in-love do with an empty house and an early evening? We did what anyone would do: we opened some port and played music for about three hours. My fingers are killing me today, but it was totally worth it, because we got another original song out of the jam session. Her words, my music. The collaboration that brought us together in the first place. Seeing a good live band can truly be inspirational sometimes.

After all the Thai food and alcohol last night, I awoke a bit precarious this morning. But I took my supplements and nursed a glass of soda water, and now I'm feeling up to taking TFMD out to breakfast at Easy Street. If and when she feels up to getting out of bed.

It's been a good weekend. And it has created a new concept for me: Valentine's Day doesn't have to be traumatic or ignored outright; it can actually be fun.

Again With The Snow

Yeah, it's dumping on us again. Big, thick, puffy flakes. Fortunately, none of it is sticking. At least not much of it is.

Had a nice dinner of crock pot stew with the family last night, followed by Martian Child with my wimminz. Then to bed.

Awoke this morning with a sense of purpose and in a fine mood. As soon as Kayleigh was at school, I took off to check out Brian Beardsley's studio as a location for the first Duo short. The space is too small, but the facility rents larger spaces by the day, so we can easily dress it. There are some other options too.

Headed back from Lake City Way to the Admiral district of West Seattle, got TFMD a little somethin'-somethin' for Valentine's Day, then hit the post office to mail off the mortgage, then down to Burien to drop Kayleigh's clarinet at the shop for a small repair, then back to Westwood for a brief stop at Target and finally Taco Del Mar for lunch -- because I apparently have a short memory when it comes to food.

Walked in the door into the ready-made conflict Tyler had handcrafted for me. It was a mess. A heated, adrenalized, ugly mess. And suddenly the sense of accomplishment and productivity I'd earned this morning came crashing down. Thank goodness for counseling in about two hours.

As I've typed this, the snow on the carport roof has begun to stick. Although I doubt we're looking at Snowmageddon II: Snowpocalypse Boogaloo, it's nonetheless quite heavy at the moment. And pretty. Fortunately the streets are looking clear, and I only have to drive across West Seattle one more time today.